Oh, My, I'm a World Class Poet Now!!

Your poem, Selected by Noble House publishers, United Kingdom

I got an email from Noble House Publishing. Apparently, some editor read my internet published poetry, or maybe some work I published for International Poetry Library, something like that. Any way, here's what the editor had to say:


As you may know, Noble House is one of the world's foremost publishers of fiction and nonfiction works by new and established authors. Our poetry division in the U.K. has had the honour of publishing the poetry of more than 800 poets over the past twelve years.

Recently I had the pleasure of reading your poetry that you have had published in the United States. I was moved so much by your written words that I have selected you to honour with our most desired and prestigious Noble House 2006 Lapel Pin. This stunning pin, crafted with 24-karat gold, proudly displays your status as an elite member of Noble House Publishers and is something you should be very proud of. This accomplishment should not be taken lightly since only a few writers have received such a distinction in the past.

Not only does the honour of wearing the Noble House Lapel Pin bring such a high level of respect in the poetic community, it also was designed by one of the premiere artists in the U.K. Samantha Higgins has been in the business of crafting precious symbolic jewellery pieces for over twenty years and is very well-known in the area. Her meticulous craftsmanship is highlighted in every jewellery piece's elaborate, yet simplistic design, not to mention the exceptional detail. Samantha Higgins used this same care and precision when she created the Noble House Lapel Pin. This striking jewellery piece has the official Noble House emblem set with 24-karat gold. It is truly a masterpiece that honours your outstanding and well-deserved accomplishments.

And that's not all! The pin comes with a Certificate of Authenticity attesting to its Limited Edition status and is formally presented in a striking, dark brown "leather" display case. Just imagine the sense of gratification you will feel when others see this Limited Edition pin with 24-karat gold honouring your poetic accomplishments and acknowledge your poetic distinction. What an impressive way to show off your status as an elite member of Noble House Publishers!

To take advantage of this 'once-in-a-lifetime' honour, simply fill out the order form or click on the link below. I must ask for a nominal fee of $69.95 (£40.20) to cover the costs incurred with the shipping, handling, and insurance of the Noble House Lapel Pin. It is extremely important to me that it is delivered to you in the right manner with the utmost care.

Susan, I was extremely delighted with your work and feel you deserve this type of recognition. Many people write poetry for years and never obtain the level of artistry that is present in your work. You should be very proud of your accomplishment.

I look forward to seeing more of your work.

Sincerely,

Nigel Hillary
Publisher,
Poetry Division
Noble House U.K.



Now, the prized work?

Poet now I know it

I always wanted to be a poet
But the words just would not flow...it
Was starting to be a waste of time so it
Made me sure that I would blow it
My chance to be a real life poet
I distracted my body with tae-bo - it
Really didn't help you know...it
Only made me sore and slow..it
Didn't help the desire go...it
Made me feel the entire woe...it
Made me sure that I would blow it
My chance to be a real life poet
I found the ILB,folks who knew great poetry
They helped me write, they helped me see
I had no chance at comedy
Like tall grass wants you to mow it
And a weedy garden needs you to hoe it
A dead car wants you to tow it
I found the line , now I'll toe it
My chance to be a real life poet!


Uh, yeah. Today the Noble Medal. Tomorrow, the Nobel Prize.

The Word for the Day....PACE

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.0.1) -
pace1  [peys] noun, verb, paced, pac‧ing.

–noun
1. a rate of movement, esp. in stepping, walking, etc.: to walk at a brisk pace of five miles an hour.
2. a rate of activity, progress, growth, performance, etc.; tempo.
3. any of various standard linear measures, representing the space naturally measured by the movement of the feet in walking: roughly 30 to 40 in. (75 cm to 1 m). Compare geometrical pace, military pace, Roman pace.
4. a single step: She took three paces in the direction of the door.
5. the distance covered in a step: Stand six paces inside the gates.
6. a manner of stepping; gait.
7. a gait of a horse or other animal in which the feet on the same side are lifted and put down together.
8. any of the gaits of a horse.
9. a raised step or platform.
–verb (used with object)
10. to set the pace for, as in racing.
11. to traverse or go over with steps: He paced the floor nervously.
12. to measure by paces.
13. to train to a certain pace; exercise in pacing: to pace a horse.
14. (of a horse) to run (a distance) at a pace: Hanover II paced a mile.
–verb (used without object)
15. to take slow, regular steps.
16. to walk up and down nervously, as to expend nervous energy.
17. (of a horse) to go at a pace.


Uh, yeah, pace and pacing. No, I'm not pacing up and down the room trying to get out the next few pages. Rather, I read through the first draft of the current novel I'm editing. Read straight through. I felt out of breath which is not a good thing for an introspective novel about a missionary questioning how she spent her life. Nope, it's not supposed to move at Thriller pace.

My running pace however, needs to move faster than thriller pace if I have any hope of Boston. Thank God for Tom Petty and "Running Down the Dream" which puts me just over 8 minute pace. Dog isn't so sure he likes that pace. But he's on the end of the leash that doesn't have the vote.

He might even be awake in time for his evening walk.

Maybe we should call it the Query Factory

The book, the World War II book that STILL doesn't have a title I love, is finally "done." That means except for fixing typos, I'm not making changes unless requested by someone with a checkbook pointed in my direction. There are five other first drafts sitting in my book closet and I really must move out of the forties.

The goal of two queries per week is working for me. Except that I hate email queries because they can get squashed so quickly. I mean, less than twelve hours for a form rejection? Oh well, not everyone likes the forties like I do. But my dilemna is that if the query is slapped back in less than ten hours, does it still count for the weekly quota, or should I send out another on Wednesday? Not today, I have a full schedule. Apparently, the natives here feel that there should be foods they enjoy in the pantry and fridge at all times. Have no idea where they got that idea.

And on the Eighth day, there was progress....

Things are going well at the Story Factory this month. We are currently on chapter 22 of the novel currently in revision, and the other eight are patiently waiting their turn. Ok, I say chapter twenty two, but who knows how many chapters there are going to be. I am almost in the middle. That much I know. And the September 15th deadline is looming large.

Of course, I am happily skipping over little things like laundry and house cleaning. Because nothing says "writer lives here" like muddy paw prints on the carpet and a washer full of sour clothing...

It's all about the tools...

And Ernest Hemingway used Dixon Ticonderoga Number 1 pencils. For those of you who never took drafting, that is the extra soft. Number 2 pencils are used to fill in all the little dots when you take standardized tests in non networked environments. Surely you remember the humble scantron. I believe my children will forget about scantrons and blue books before they graduate from college.

Anyway, the number one extra soft that Papa preferred was perfect for editing bacause it is thick and dark. Yet you can still erase things when you change your mind yet again.

I ordered four dozen number one pencils from Lasermonks and they arrived on Friday. Can you say Happy Campers live here?

IT'S ALMOST TIME!!

Sorry to shout, but it's almost time. Time to start thinking and plotting and daydreaming about a set of characters for the time-honored tradition of National Novel Writing Month. So far, I will be a Municipal Liaison again, mosttly because I really want a t-shirt this year. But the thing was a blast and there should be some cool ways to get more people involved this year. I may even send out the press release to some of the local papers. Publicity, what a concept.

So, I have my fountain pens and Dixon Ticonderoga's on order from lasermonks.com and I will be equipped to write huge quantities of really bad novel. Because that is what November is all about.

Turtle writing

"It takes an awful lot of time for me to write anything. I have
endless drafts, one after another; and I try out fifty,
seventy-five, or a hundred variations on a single line sometimes. I
work on the process of refining low-grade ore. I get maybe a couple
of nuggets of gold out of fifty tons of dirt. It is tough for me.
No, I am not inspired."
--James Dickey


See, I am not alone. I have been working on this one novel, oh, for about three years. Consistantly. Quite a few thinking about it before that. Thing is, the questions every one asks, "Is the book published? How's the book?" stop being nice after the first year or so. Because John Grisham can churn out three books and year, as can most romance novelists, the general, non-book writing population thinks that is the regular production level. And we laugh here at the storyfactory. Actually, Lego the dog laughs, I just want to cry and get the stinking thing done.

But it's a lot like baking bread. There are some things that cannot, in anyway be rushed. It has to proof, like yeasty dough. All you can do is make sure the conditions are right and let the little yeast critters do their thing. With books, you have to make the conditions right and then let the story do its thing. Otherwise it feels forced and fake. Madeleine L'Engle calls is serving the work. The story grows like yeast and you know when it's ready, when it is strong enough for you to work on it without killing it.

And then there are the huge rabbit trails you go on and get lost, and have to back track and rewrite and yeesh...



"I turn sentences around. That's my life. I write a sentence and
then I turn it around. Then I look at it and I turn it around
again. Then I have lunch. Then I come back in and write another
sentence. Then I have tea and turn the new sentence around. Then I
read the two sentences over and turn them both around. Then I lie
down on my sofa and think. Then I get up and throw them out and
start from the beginning."
--Philip Roth

And there's a day's work.

Slow and steady wins the race...

I have been editing a 550 page novel at the amazing rate of 20 pages per day. Okay, it was 20 pages the first day and then I planned to revise twenty pages each day after that. The best laid plans...

But the good news is, it's pre-season football season. There is nothing better than curling up on the sofa with a stack of pages and a Dixon Ticonderoga Number One, extra soft (like Papa Hemingway used to use). See, there's replays, so I don't have to watch the live stuff. And I can even fire up the laptop.

So hopefully, things will progress this week and I can be starting new work by September 15th. Or 21st, you know, new season, new book.

The What If department

What if the same folks who produce Ambien, also sell weight loss pills? Hmmm

Surreality shows....

While writing about a book in my Random Acts of Reading blog, I mentioned a fellow and a frequent occurence from eight grade. I actually included his name and the teacher's name. Couple days later, there was a comment from him, a big time California lawyer now. My surreal moment of the week. I think he must have had someone on his staff google his name once a week, can't think of another way for him to find my obscure readinng log. He remembered the book and the teacher, but not her favorite comment about him. His comment to me was "Geez, you have an amazing memory!"

I've been thinking about that, because I don't really have a great memory. But I remember junior high, more than high school and college. And not because of any chemical additives. I think the reason I remember junior high is because I wrote every day, and the reason I remember my junior high classmates is because I wrote about them. I do remember 4th grade pretty clearly as well. I read Harriet the Spy that year and kept a notebook about that year, a la Harriet. It did not go over well for me there, once people found the notebook. I solved that problem in Junior High by writing for "publication". I wrote a soap opera and my classmates were the characters. Every night, I would write two pages of dialogue and then call my best friend Maryanne and we would discuss the episode. She would make editorial suggestions and if I agreed, I would make changes. Then I would re write the thing, this time on a sandwich of carbon paper and notebook paper. I learned early to only bring one copy to school.

So what happened? In high school, there were "things" that had to be done, things that would lead to engineering degrees and law schools and grad degrees, etc. I followed along and did those things, even though I really had no intention of being any of those things. I always intended to be a writer. Somehow, my little twelve year old brain knew that to do that, I had to write every day and I did. In HS and the first two years of college, I didn't. And there was plenty to write about. So, did I just have more time and energy to write in Jr. High? Less time and energy dedicated to pretending to be something else? Jr. High kids have the amazing ability to totally be themselves and HS's do a good job of getting that out of them. Or at least me.

So I guess, like any good writer, I've spend a good chunk of years procrastinating.

"As a writer, I need an enormous amount of time alone. Writing is 90% procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching informercials. It's a matter of doing everything you can to avoid writing until it is about four in the morning and you reach the point where you have to write. Having anybody watching that or attempting to share it with me would be grisly."-- Paul Rudnick.

Exciting times at the Story Factory...

Last time I looked, our little site is getting very close to the thousandth visitor. I know, small numbers for some, but I am pretty pumped about getting into the four digit numbers.

Coming this fall at the story factory, two exciting new works of fiction will be in progress, along with a contest to find better titles for some existing, but badly titled works. The two new things have titles already, Tyranny of the Ordinary, otherwise known as TOTO and The Brothers Keen. Ideas and research for both books are coming in nicely and I'm honestly not sure which book with get written first, although I will make every attempt to save one of them for November and the annual insanity known as National Novel Writing Month, NaNoWriMo.

But the big question remains, which book comes first, the political book that will be fun, but a lot of research, or the other one, that will be more life based, at least life that I have been a bit more invovled in.

Shuttle Update...

Discovery undocked from the space station. They're checking for damage and getting set to come home tomorrow.

http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/shuttle/main/index.html

Motivations...and finding God in Stephen King

Why do writers write? Because it isn't there.
Thomas Berger


After reading some writing quotes, it struck me. Most of the truly successful writers have industrial sized chips on their shoulders. And are quite proud to show them off. The novels I've been reading this summer, the ones that get under your skin and stay with you a few days, they're not written by nice people with a message of grace and love to spread to the world. Most of them are damd mad and not going to take it anymore.

The problem is, nice people don't get mad. That's what my mother taught me. Anger was the big no no. Don't feel it, and certainly don't express it, not in front of anyone, anyway. So I go and write a book and totally ignore that fact that the main character is so pissed at the world it colors everything she does. I ignore and therefore she ignores it, denies it, and the whole book ends up feeling like a lie. So the question of the book becomes, sure the command is Be angry, but sin not, but what happens when you don't listen to that sage advice. What happens when you get angry and sin your heart out, then go on a bit more? I'm starting to think that's the book. Because nice girls didn't get angry in the forties. They didn't live it out and take it out on strangers.

Which isn't the typical "female adventure story." But maybe it's a bit closer to the female experience, of the world falling apart at the seams and not being able to do a damn thing the fix it.

So it's all Stephen King's fault. I've been reading through his stuff, in mostly chronological order this summer. And something stands out. In the darkness of all his stories, the light is clear. There is good and evil and no doubt which side is which. Unlike real life. But light shines brighter in the dark. You really don't need a flashlight at twighlight, but it sure is necessary at one am on a moonless night. But more on that another time...


Rage is the only quality which has kept me, or anybody I have ever
studied, writing columns for newspapers.
-- Jimmy Breslin



What I have most wanted to do throughout the past ten years is to make political writing into an art. My starting point is always a feeling of partisanship, a sense of injustice. When I sit down to write a book, I do not say to myself, ‘I am going to produce a work of art’. I write it because there is some lie that I want to expose, some fact to which I want to draw attention, and my initial concern is to get a hearing. - George Orwell



I hated school. I don't trust anybody who looks back on the years from 14 to 18 with any enjoyment. If you liked being a teenager, there's something really wrong with you.
Stephen King


ps, I only liked school until I was 14. And I enjoyed college. But hs was the pits.

Fire on the Mountain

"Write while the heat is in you. The writer who postpones the
recording of his thoughts uses an iron which has cooled to burn a
hole with. He cannot inflame the minds of his audience."
--Henry David Thoreau


There is probably the biggest problem I have had lately writing. Writing while the idea is still fresh and new. It gets sometimes to where by the time I get to writing somthing, it's already stale and old because I have reworked it mentally so many times that it isn't new enough to write anymore. Not sure that makes sense, but there it is. After six or seven mental playbacks, the scene isn't fun anymore. Writing, instead of a process of discovery, becomes a work of transcription. I think this is what Thoreau is talking about when he talks about heat. It's the flame consuming new fuel that is the heat of writing, not a picture of campfire hung on a wall. There is a certain life to a campfire compared to the dryness of processes central heat. And unfortunately, we're taught that the central heat is desirable.





"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from
mediocre minds."
--Albert Einstein

And you should go see what's goin on with Discovery today...

http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/shuttle/main/index.html

Space Junkie

I was not born a space junkie. It was a gift from my father, when I was about five years old and my father woke me up and made me watch Neil Armstrong walk on the moon. It was history, and gosh darn, Dad wouldn't let me miss it, inspite of the late hour and my mother's non-interest. We watched every space flight that was broadcast after that.

But the biggest gift to space junkies ever, is the internet. NASA TV live over the internet is much better than any ten minute coverage the networks can provide. Something about the ordinaryness of some fellow in the firing room getting up and walking to the coffee pot in the back of the room. It's the third time it's on this week and still exciting.

The two best things though, are the crew radio checks and the final "polling".
Crew radio checks occur after the crew is secured in the shuttle. The crew then has to check communications with the firing room, launch command and mission control in Houston. Then they are instructed to not touch the knobs except to adjust the volume for their own comfort. The thing is, the voices are so full of anticipation and excitment. It's the first flight for Lisa Nowak and Stephanie Wilson and they're voices aren't seasoned scientists, but little girls at Christmas. Same with the boys. They are even more pumped, especially those who've done it before. Apparently, there's nothing "Been there, done that" about space travel.

The final polling is when the launch director goes down the list and asks each area for go-no go. Even the voices of these engineers and specialists drip with excitement. These folks love what they do. I'm sure there are politics and personality problems, affairs, and all the other crap that comes with government work, but today, they are going to space. Everything else is so much crap.

On our trip to Flordia in 1976, my family and I were subjected the full propaganda machine about the space shuttle. We bought it and I still have a hard time believing there are folks out there that are not exciting about space travel and the space station. Our Florida trip in 2004, we went to the Cape again, this time the propaganda machine was focused on Mars. Know what? I'm with them. Let's go.

I don't think there's anything better than launching Discovery on the 4th of July. Except maybe launching the Mars trip on another 4th.

Things are not what they appear...

The email quote this morning was from W.S. Gilbert : Things are seldom what they seem, skim milk masquerades as cream.

Which naturally made me think of the lyrics to a song, "Things are not what they appear", but I could not for the life of me remember what movie the durn song came from. Finally, at 5 pm, I can stand it no longer. Google reveals all:

Things Are Not What They Appear
Radcliff:
Your royal highnesses, lords and ladies of the court, and our distinguished guests from the forests of the new world.

Performers:
Things are not what they appear
As tonight will make quite clear
But what is real will be revealed
I can feel the moment's near
Things are never what they seem
That will be this evening's theme
A music sites for your delight
Perhaps a few to make you scream

Radcliff:
You will be surprised to see whose disguise
Is the cleverest one of the lot
After our show the whole world will know
Who's pretending to be what they're not
If a jester's grin or a dancer's spin
Should be pleasing, please say, yea




Yep, the ever popular, Pocahontas II. What a thing to remember.

And to connect a Disney direct to DVD animated movie to the venerable Gilbert and Sullivan. I am ashamed. But, as the wise one said, Skim milk does masquerade as cream.

Vote for your favorite first line...

I'm experimenting with a new project, so if you have a few minutes, tell me which first line makes you want to keep reading, or makes you want to put a gun in your mouth.


1. Sometimes, you wake up one morning and realize that your life is just a rough sketch and you really need to start taking the time to color it in.

2. We are such caricatures sometimes, having the shape of a real life, but not actually the life itself.

3. They said it would be just a research facility. But I know better. Research is a corporate euphenism for "We have no idea what the f*** we're doing."

On writing

I have an addiction to writing books. Actually, not the How to books, not the better dialogue in three easy steps, or Formatting your manuscript type books. I like the ones by real writers, one's I've heard of. Stephen King's On Writing, David Morrell's Lesson's from a Lifetime of Writing, and Terry Brook's Sometimes the Magic Works.Sure, there are some other one's out there, but if I like the authors' books, I tend to like the advice better. I also note a lack of women on my list. Hmmm.

But I did find an interesting quote from Erica Jong of all people. A war quote, in her book, Writing for My Life.

Young people feel immortal. That's why old people can send them to war.

Ten things I learned this week....

1. Running 13 miles when the temperature is in the mid to high nineties is stupid.

2. The fellow who cuts my hair has wonderful book and movie recommendations. His reading list alone is worth the price of a hair cut.

3. I can never predict what time the mail carrier will come to my street and I never will be able to guarantee the mail will be in the box in time.

4. Watching golf on tv is a great sleep aid. Unless Phil Mickelson is melting down.

5. If you can't really use the name Sara Pride for a character because it's someone's real name, then the name Arianna Hubris will do just fine.

6. There's a t-shirt I'm trying to find. It says, "If I only have one day to live, take me to a swim meet. They last forever." I really want that shirt.

7. A really great blog for Screwtape letter fans: Beezleblog This guy is good.

8. I've personalized my browser so much, it's going to be a step down to upgrade. But I'm a whole version number behind and some sites don't work as well. Time to suck it up.

9. I really don't like vampire books. From experience now.

10.Long walks are still the best way to plot a book.

Oh, and a quiz! It's Bonus Day at the Story Factory!

Which OS are You?

Which Nigerian spammer are You?